Santa: Around the World in 26 Hours? - writercize #144

Ever wonder how Santa could deliver gifts to all the children who celebrate Christmas around the world in one night? 

Thanks to the earth's rotation and long nights in some areas, The Dinner Party hosts told Madeline Brand of NPR last Friday that Santa has about 26 hours to deliver the gifts. That still breaks down to a LOT of gift giving, chimney sliding, sled flying and cookie eating per second. 365,000 to be exact. And they only included Christian children in the world, who are clearly not the only ones who celebrate the holiday. I know plenty of agnostics and atheists who hang stockings for the kids!

So, how does Santa do it? Magic? Science? And how does he get in the houses without chimneys? Does he still wear the toasty red suit while delivering in the southern hemisphere?

Let your imagination run wild, and tell us how it's done!

writercize: Create an argument for how Santa Claus manages to deliver gifts to 365,000 children per second.

Click "read more" for writercizer sample response using the space-time continuum.

This post partially inspired by the prompt "wonder" through the Group Blogging Experience hosted by the "wonder"ful Beth Grace. There's always room for more group bloggers - check it out!

writercizer sample response:

When Santa Claus first had the job of delivering presents to young boys and girls, it was much easier than it is today - the world's population was significantly smaller, and his public relations team was limited, so fewer kids expected gifts on Christmas morning. Over the years, word of mouth grew, children grew up and had children of their own, who they told about the wonder of Christmas morning and gifts in your stocking, and Santa's job became exponentially more difficult.

He knew something had to be done. He considered outsourcing some of the delivery to his elves, or assigning local Santas for the task, but he knew that he would miss his annual trip around the globe and that warm feeling he got from doing the deliveries himself.

So, Santa did some research and started looking into Physics to see if it would be possible to continue his life's work. Luckily, while reading through the books, he ran across the complicated mathematical principle of the space-time continuum, set a couple of his most intelligent elves to track down the leading researchers of the principle, and invited them up to the North Pole for a little chat over coffee and cookies one bright July night.

Together, Santa and the scientists devised a way in which he could travel faster than Earth's time itself, in such a way that he would not feel the least bit rushed within his super speed time schedule, but he'd be moving so fast relative to Earth time that no little girls and boys would be able to see him enter the house, leave the gifts and eat dessert.

He's been using it ever since, sneaking into homes right under the noses of parents and children, without leaving a trace beyond the trail of crumbs and loaded stockings. It's saved Santa more small talk than even he could imagine, and allows him to personally deliver to each and every child who believes in his generosity of spirit.